November 23, 2009

JEWISH BRAINS


The Israelis and Arabs finally realized that if they continued
fighting, they would someday end up destroying the world.

So they sat down and decided to settle the whole dispute with a
dogfight. The negotiators agreed that each country would take five
years to develop the best fighting dog they could.

The dog that won the fight would earn its country the right to rule
the disputed areas.

The losing side would have to lay down its arms.

The Arabs found the biggest, meanest Dobermans and Rottweilers in the
world. They bred them together and then crossed their offspring with
the meanest Siberian wolves.

They selected only the biggest, strongest puppy from each litter,
killed all the other puppies and fed them the best food . They used
steroids and trainers in their quest for the perfect killing machine.

After the five years were up, they had a dog that needed iron prison
bars on its cage. Only the trainers could handle this beast. When the
day of the big fight arrived, the Israelis showed up with a strange
animal.

It was a nine-foot-long Dachshund. Everyone felt sorry for the
Israelis. No one else thought this weird animal stood a chance against
the growling beast in the Arab camp. The bookies predicted the Arabs
would win in less than a minute. The cages were opened. The
Dachshund waddled toward the center of the ring.

The Arab dog leapt from his cage and charged the giant wiener-dog. As
he got to within an inch of the Israeli dog, the Dachshund opened its
jaws and swallowed the Arab beast in one bite. There was nothing left
but a small bit of fur from the killer dog's tail.

The Arabs approached the Israelis, shaking their heads in disbelief.
"We do not understand. Our top scientists and breeders worked for five
years with the meanest, biggest Dobermans and Rott weilers. They
developed a killing machine."

"Really?" the Israelis replied "We had our top plastic surgeons
working for five years to make an alligator look like a Dachshund.

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