January 8, 2012

Mature Readers Only

This should be read only by mature persons.

1970: Long hair
2010: Longing for hair

1970: KEG
2010: EKG

1970: Acid rock
2010: Acid reflux

1970: Moving to California because it's cool
2010: Moving to Arizona because it's warm

1970: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
2010: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor

1970: Seeds and stems
2010: Roughage

1970: Hoping for a BMW
2010: Hoping for a BM

1970: Going to a new, hip joint
2010: Receiving a new hip joint

1970: Rolling Stones
2010: Kidney Stones

1970: Screw the system
2010: Upgrade the system

1970: Disco
2010: Costco

1970: Parents begging you to get your hair cut
2010: Children begging you to get their heads shaved

1970: Passing the drivers' test
2010: Passing the vision test

1970: Whatever
2010: Depends

Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together
a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset of this year's
incoming freshmen. Here's this year's list:

The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born
in 1992.
They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up. Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.
The CD was introduced 2 years before they were born.
They have always had an answering machine.
They have always had cable.
They cannot fathom not having a remote control..
Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.
Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.
They never heard: "Where's the Beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a Camel", or
"de plane, Boss, de plane.."
They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. even is..
Mc Donald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.

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