Eight Deep Thoughts

EIGHT THOUGHTS TO PONDER
 
Number 8
Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 7
Good health is merely the slowest possible
rate at which one can die.

Number 6
Men have two emotions :  Hungry and Horny .
If you see a gleam in his eyes,
make him a sandwich.

Number 5
Give a person a fish and you feed them
for a day. Teach a person to use the
Internet and they won't bother you
for weeks, months, maybe years.

Number 4
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday,
lying in the hospitals, dying of nothing.

Number 3
All of us could take a lesson from the weather.
It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 2
In the 60's, people took acid to make the
world weird. Now the world is weird and
people take Prozac to make it normal.

And The Number 1 Thought

Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers--
what you do today,
might burn your ass tomorrow.


- - - and as someone recently said to me:
"Don't worry about old age --
it doesn't last that long."